My 20 For 2020

New Year.  Same Me.  

Because I am already pretty damn awesome, just the way I am.  And so are you!

I am sitting at a coffee shop working on my laptop while Gibson is at a theater workshop and the song “Love The One You’re With” comes on. So appropriate for my thoughts tonight about New Year’s resolutions.   

Now, ya’ll know that resolutions are just a ploy invented by marketing departments and economists, designed to keep us feeling bad about ourselves (especially women…) so that we will keep spending money to feel better and keep the economy rolling…

It feels SO good to set a resolution and dream of how much better your life will be when you change that thing about yourself, right?  And then you feel even shittier when you “fail” at your resolution, even though it usually just means that you are where you were before (which, by the way, was perfect.)  Press repeat, over and over, year after year, all that you are telling yourself is that you can’t do anything.  That it’s too hard. You don’t have any willpower. (and of course, you have proof – I mean, look at how many times you have failed at this?!)

The most common resolutions are usually something like:” Eat Healthier, Exercise More, Lose Weight, Drink Less, Save More Money” and when asked why the response from people is that they will be happier.  I don’t think they are talking about runners high or those exercise endorphins that we’ve been promised.  

Here’s the thing: You aren’t going to all of a sudden be happy when you hit some goal that you made up, just because the calendar turned another page.

Spoiler Alert.  

Losing weight isn’t going to make you happy

Stopping drinking when you don’t actually want to isn’t going to make you happy.

Buying a new house or driving a new car isn’t going to make you happy.  

Restricting yourself to not eating “bad food” isn’t going to make you happy.  

Making more money in your business isn’t going to make you happy (well…maybe that one will…hahaha)

You have to work on being happy today.

>>> Love The One You’re With <<<

(Today. Right Now.  Whatever weight you are, what amount your bank account shows, where ever you are living.)

 And if you can be happy today, you know what?  The changes you want to make will be even easier because you won’t be attempting them from a place of disgust, hate, anger or frustration. Much in the same way I believe that you can’t discipline your children into obedience, you can’t hate yourself into positive changes.  Real lasting changes come from love.  

I mean, research shows that only 19% of New Year’s resolutions are ever even achieved.   

Oofff.  Those aren’t great odds.  But when was the last time you heard of someone setting a resolution to love themselves more?  Or something that wasn’t to change something about themselves to ‘be better’? I know causation isn’t correlation, but….

But, I hear you – I am like you and I like to set goals and intentions for myself for the year.  I love to challenge myself to try new things and think differently. 


When I heard Gretchen Rubin first talk on her podcast about her 18 in 18 list a few years ago, I fell in love with the idea. And she has continued doing them each year. (learn more about that her 20 in 20 list here!

It’s all about setting intentions for what you want to create during the new year, not what you want to change about yourself.  I shared this idea with my team and family and we all decided to create 20 in 2020 lists as well – and I would love to challenge you to create one too!

Our lists include a wide range, including fitness goals, work accomplishments, books to read, places to visit, and even TV shows we hope to enjoy.  This list is not a list of outcomes, but instead action items…things you can DO.

Here’s my 20 in 20 list – what’s on yours? I’ll check-in and give you some updates on Instagram as the year goes on, so be sure you are following me over there at Empowered Profit.  

  1. Run a 5k
  2. Complete an Adventure/Spartan race with Troy
  3. Ride my Peloton three times a week
  4. Plant a garden
  5. Get another tattoo
  6. Start my MoneyMonday Instagram show
  7. Complete a hand lettering project
  8. Complete an embroidery project
  9. Take the EA exam (and pass!)
  10. Do a boudoir photoshoot
  11. Take singing lessons & perform a song
  12. Learn 5 new songs on the piano & the guitar
  13. Host 8 lunches/dinners/game nights with friends
  14. Make sourdough bread from scratch
  15. Make the perfect nut-based cheese
  16. Enjoy a fun family day each month 
  17. Read 100 books
  18. Fund Troy’s birthday trip to India (Need $10K)
  19. Go to more cultural events/shows
  20. Try 8 new restaurants with Troy

What do you hope to accomplish this year? Share below or share on Instagram and tag me at Empowered Profit so I can celebrate with you!


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